Slow Paced Weekend: A Time For Myself

Hi, I have a thought I want to share. The weekend is a time to relax. What about you? For working people, whether you are a SAHM or remote WFH individual, or even if you have a regular 9-5 job where you commute to work, you can look forward to the weekend days. Actually, for me, even if I WFH or, also I could say SAHM for Kai the kitten, I still crave "me" time for myself.

Although I share a space with my family, renting a room means I still have a responsibility to my family. We share chores and we take on what needs to be done to have a clean organized living space. I almost always end up working in the kitchen most of the time.

Being with my depression it is hard to gather myself together to organize my room.

Especially since it gets messy easily because of its small size. I am planning soon I would love a little cottage house or a casita at the back of my parent's house. (For now, we can't have tenancy because the house is turned into a business my mother has.) I am on a mission to save money for building a house at the back and be ecstatic once it comes to fruition. But for now, I make this moment and make the most out of my little situation here in my room in my parent's apartment.

This is where it gets interesting. My mom and I almost always collaborate on where we could go during the weekdays on her off days and stay home if we must as much as possible during the weekend.

True, we get out from time to time for groceries or a little necessary shopping at department stores.

Avoiding the crowd on weekends during a weekday trip is a needed time not to be rushed and have a slow easy pace.

I for one, am her itinerary planner. Wherever we could have a day trip together, we just would if finances allow. For her and me we crave slowing down at home and, dare I say, it is not only just a luxury to rest but a necessity.

I like slow weekends. And this is a note for me looking forward to better even more slowing down days in the future. At this pace I've been practicing now I need much more slowing down.

Mondays are back on the grind again.

My body, mental, and emotional capacity crave to slow down. Even if it is just on the weekends. This gesture to myself has the effect of resetting to tackle yet another start of the week's fresh and ready-to-do WFH tasks. Even if your "slowing down" is different from mine. I know we all have preferences. When you reflect on the past of how you slowed down, how did you do it? Did it help? How did you enjoy that time?

My Thoughts on Relaxing

Relaxing is about doing "nothing"-it's about doing what soothes you without guilt. This is difficult to do when all you are used to is working from home. Just like that. Work, and more work. Working from home especially has this effect as it's a blurry line between: Saying, "I'll just neatly sum up to proof and edit my blog article before it is scheduled to go live", next thing I know I need to stop, to just a little bit more, to reasoning on yourself, "this isn't work, is it?"

If you are like me, if you are working from home, you know. How that train of thought goes.

But on a positive note, sometimes, relaxation looks like a quiet cup of coffee with no scrolling, just staring at my cat lounging in the sun. And having wobbly runs ka-dink, ka-dink, ka-dink. And tiny mews.

It's also okay to redefine productivity-rest is productive, especially when it restores self.

Joys I Find That Surround Me

Since I am accustomed to my surroundings from the noises, and the ambiance. And the how the morning makes a quiet sun kissed glow to everything and such things as the gentle clinking of the dishes while washing up after breakfast, microwave is working on heating a cup of instant coffee and with added natural ingredients that benefits wellness from the inside out. The birds outside the window, or the comfort of my favorite blanket-small joys remind me I am alive and safe.

Joy doesn't always come out loud and proud; sometimes, it tiptoes in through the mundane. Choosing to notice the good around you is a quiet rebellion against burnout.

My Experience in Panic/Anxiety Attacks

Anxiety can feel like being locked in a glass room, screaming with no sound. I feel broken together, in a distress, to panic and responding to something I need myself to pay attention to.

Panic attacks taught me how deeply I was neglecting my own needs as I can recall in the past. They were scary-but they also cracked open a new way of listening to myself. The feeling of tightening in the chest, cold sweat, a little feeling of claustrophobia, headache, and dizziness.

I'm not defined by my lowest moments-but I am shaped by how I chose to grow from them. My mom suggests to me I should go outside and breathe fresh air and sit on the bench at the park outside near the pool area.

Paying Attention to Your Needs (Mental & Emotional)

It took a while of realizing my needs are not a burden, they're a roadmap.

Having boundaries isn't selfish-it's a way to slowly heal. Allowing myself to have a room to breathe is quite a refreshing relief of anxiety that make me not enclosed in a glass room, screaming with no sound. Even if I also can't hear my own self.

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Getting better is not a straight path-it's a spiral. And every loop teaches you something new. I wouldn't go back, even if I could. Those harder moments gave me the wisdom to choose differently today.

I gently speak to myself a practical affirmation in the process of healing. Even if it is hard, I am letting hope and change feel like warm light peeking through the clouds. I am allowing myself to heal at my own pace-and that in itself is a blessing to continually pursue and looking back at this as steppingstones to progress forward.